Planning a Funeral – Choosing a Funeral Director

Finding the Right Funeral Director

When you've narrowed your selection down to just a few, check their licences, references and reputations. A good director won't take offense at you asking for these things, he'll be only too happy for you to hear of his excellent service. Some funeral directors provide added benefits like aftercare and bereavement travel plans, so there's a lot to consider in your decision.

You may remember the story of the funeral home that chopped off a man’s legs so that he would fit into his coffin. The legs of the 6’7” preacher were chopped between the ankle and calf and put in the coffin alongside him. This of course is an extreme case of malpractice by a funeral home. But it drives home the point that you do need to be careful when selecting a funeral director. This particular director should have suggested a larger coffin for the deceased, more expensive or not. That simple advice would have saved the family a lot of pain, and he would still have his licence.

Before you Choose

This incident is, as I said, an extreme example. It does prove however, that funeral directors can be fallible; in this case a bit stupid, and definitely insensitive. Therefore, equip yourself with a checklist, and be prepared to ask as many questions that you can think of. A good way to locate a reliable and trustworthy funeral director is to ask for references from friends, colleagues or neighbours who may have used a funeral director in your area.

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After you Decide

Okay, you’ve decided to go with a particular funeral home. Before you can ask any specific questions, you first need to know exactly what a funeral director is responsible for. A funeral director, in essence, is responsible for everything concerning the deceased.

This involves transporting the body, preparing it for display at the funeral (if it will be an open coffin), directing the entire ceremony, and coordinating with the family and venue.

Those duties alone will provide you with plenty of questions. What type of coffin do they suggest? Will it be an open or closed coffin? How much will it cost? Is cremation an option? Things like that may seem obvious, but it’s best to leave nothing to chance. The funeral director can advise you on how to dress the deceased, and what jewellery, etc. would be appropriate. Ask the director if his staff are fully trained and licensed. The person who cut the legs off the gentleman mentioned at the beginning of this article was an unlicensed member of staff.

Other Services

The funeral director will also guide you in handling the paperwork and advise you of any legal issues regarding the burial. Besides the death certificate, he should assist you with insurance claims, veteran’s benefits, and any pensions or annuities you may have coming to you. There is really so much to consider, I’ve provided a basic checklist that I hope will be helpful.

1. Ask for prices and make sure the funeral home specifies what goods and services are necessary and which are not. For instance sometimes embalming is not necessary.
2. There is usually a mandatory fee included in funeral homes charges which includes basic services like placing an obituaries ad and liaising with clerics. Clarify this before you do these things yourself.
3. Get everything in writing. Make sure there is a clear definition of goods and services to be provided.
4. Ask to see licences and qualifications of the director and any staff who will be assisting him.

1. Make sure to bring the paperwork regarding your plot with you to the funeral home. If you don’t have a plot the funeral director can assist you in purchasing one, or can locate it for you if you know you have one but you’re not sure where.
2. Get specifics of the type of service that will be conducted and clarify viewing times etc. If a wake will be held, make sure of times and venue, catering etc.
3. Go over the entire program in detail regarding flower arrangements, music, eulogies etc.
4. If you aren’t able to arrange friends or family as pall bearers, ask the funeral home for help.
5. Discuss transportation possibilities for taking family to funeral and organising accommodation for out of town attendees.
6. If you have a headstone, inquire about engraving, if you don’t have one discuss pricing and possibilities.